Valentine’s Day. Valentine’s Week. What comes to mind? Kisses (the chocolate and the action), romantic dates, cute gifts, a slew of couples’ Instagram posts. Valentine’s Day tends to be such an important date to society, in many parts of the world.

The rest of the year is similar, but less demanding. There’s always a market for romance and love and school crushes and it all comes crashing down on people near Valentine’s Day. There seems to be a lot of things touched by this idea; and when I say a lot of things, I mean a lot of things. Society is so infatuated with the thought of romance, of love, that very little can reach through the haze of stars and relationships and affect us.

Why are we so dependent on the feeling of love? For example, take music. Out of over a thousand songs on my Spotify account, at least 600 are romantic, as an educated guess. I listen to them because they sound nice, but I struggle with finding music that doesn’t imply relationships, romance, or the like. And those are the love songs I like to listen to. There are millions upon millions of songs that are related to love. It’s an important emotion, but we seem to have a strong dependence on it.

I am aware that love is an important part of the world, but as I get older and see people come of age and start having crushes that turn into pining, I see how dangerous this feeling is. People cry, they hurt silently, they watch with broken hearts as their muse dates another person. Living in a world hyped up on this painful emotion can be hard on people.

Many will tell you that the fight is worth it. I think it is. The happiness it can bring a person, the way someone’s eyes light up when they talk about someone they care about, that little smile that your friend has when you know they’re thinking about that person. The stupid selfies with your partner and the cheesy (although no one cares how cheesy) gifts. It’s heartwarming to see people being happy because someone else exists. But the world needs to be aware that there are other ways to be happy besides a relationship, and I feel like society sometimes overlooks that possibility.

Love has very many variables and components. I know platonic love personally. That love you have for your best friends, your family, your hobbies, your favorite pieces of artwork, most everything you might say you love casually. Everyone has felt this sort of attachment, but I don’t think very many people realize that it can be just as good a feeling as romance. I survive quite well with this sort of feeling, and very few people seem to realize that it is an option for love. We don’t need that romantic climax of a movie, with the passionate kiss. You may want that, really bad, and it can help you be happier, but don’t let it be an addiction that can potentially be harmful.

In the end, it’s all really about a person’s happiness. Although I may not be able to understand romantic attraction and love to its full power, it should be a part of society, simply because of its strong power and pull of emotions, in both the good direction and the bad. But so should platonic love, for similar reasons. The idea of love as infatuation can be turned into such a strong force that it can be imposing. Let it be a part of your life, but make sure you don’t let it define who you are, an act all too easy to accomplish in today’s society.