Which Sauce is Truly the Boss?

Clarissa Smith, Columnist

A question that not many have considered, but may sound familiar: what is the best condiment? People may debate over topics like which is the best fruit? Or maybe, what should be Arizona’s state drink (apparently not lemonade)? But now it’s time to tackle this new controversy.  

To answer this question, the students of Journalism will insert their own opinions. My hypothesis is that ketchup will end up on top. It’s crazy versatile, tastes great, and is made by arguably the best fruit: tomatoes. But others may have a different view on things. Maybe a condiment will emerge as the victor that you haven’t heard of before.

First and foremost, though, there needs to be a definition of “best.” We have decided that the three main things that make a condiment “the best” is its versatility, the benefits, and taste. With this in mind, conclusions will be drawn and the divisions will be evident.

 

Clarissa Smith, Columnist: My original opinion to this debate was ranch, but I’ve reconsidered. Pesto is by far the greatest condiment ever. It’s versatile, it’s got all kinds of health benefits, like a ton of vitamins K, E, and A,, and is a taste of heaven. It’s also perfect for a healthy sandwich with a burst of flavor.  

Addy Bennett, Editor-in-Chief: I may get a lot of flack for this, and I totally get why. It’s not versatile, it’s not the most delicious thing I’ve ever tasted, but I choose to die on this hill. In-n-Out sauce is the best condiment out there. On the common occurrence in which I am found in the In-n-Out drive-thru line, you can bet that I’m utilizing my “extra spread” card when I order. You can bet that I sometimes bite the bullet and get animal fries just because I want to eat the spread with some bland potato sticks. You can bet that on every In-n-Out meal, I am licking that little brown piece of paper that hugs the burger, squeezing tears out of my eyes because it’s never enough. It’s never enough! In summation, I love In-n-Out spread! I love it more than anything in the world! It is tangy, sweet, savory, textured by the bits of pickles that swim in that peachy ocean of flavor. It is what makes the In-n-Out burger so good, and it is so good. (In the case that I was using my head over my heart, it would be peanut butter, though.)

Selina Fluty, Editor of Student Opinion: I thought it was ranch. I thought it was ranch. It’s convenient, it’s versatile, you can apparently fry chicken in it. But it’s not ranch. It’s gravy. I promise you, the best condiment is gravy. It goes on everything! It goes on those sad potato sticks Addy’s talking about. The Canadians have that combo down to perfection with poutine. It goes on mashed potatoes. It goes on meats. If you’re being dangerous, it can go on burgers. Starbucks sells chicken biscuit breakfast sandwiches with gravy. And as someone who eats Starbucks four nights a week because I work there, that gravy is quality. It’s a simple roux, and then you throw in all the flavor you’ve ever wanted and could ever desire. Gravy is genuinely a bop, and as much as there are some strong contenders in this article, I just have to stand by gravy.

Erika Sonnemann-Creed, Editor of Features & Extras: I just like Sriracha. I put that stuff on everything – pizza, in ramen, in my stir fry, etc. It’s like a miracle condiment. And you can use it to fend off people who try to eat from your plate at restaurants. Step back, Robin Hood! You won’t be robbin’ from my plate anytime soon. Not while I’ve covered it in enough edible napalm to burn down an entire forest.

Noah Stults: Soy sauce is by far the best condiment of them all. In any Asian restaurant, you will find that beautiful bottle of soy sauce laying there on the table waiting for you to pour over you food. You can use it in so many ways and it gives your dish so much flavor. You can use soy sauce for a base in your soup or ramen, add it to your fried rice, and even pour it over your meat in order to make it more juicy. Soy sauce can also be made to make delicious desserts such as salty sesame dark chocolate chip cookies or soy sauce and brown sugar ice cream. You can’t make ice cream with ranch, gravy, or pesto. For these reasons, soy sauce is the best condiment in the world.

Amber Fretwell, Columnist: I think Chick-fil-A sauce is the best condiment there is because of its consistency and its versatility, and not to mention, the taste is just beyond good. The consistency is a little thick for a condiment or sauce, but it leaves a long-lasting taste in your mouth that is AMAZING. It is so versatile because you can pair it will french fries, chicken, veggies, and more. You don’t even need a lot of the sauce for it to fill your mouth with goodness, and for it to compliment whatever you’re eating. It is a combination of barbeque sauce and honey mustard. Like, how wild is that? If you need a versatile condiment to pair with your food, grab your local Chick-fil-A sauce today, except you can’t get it on Sunday because they aren’t open on Sundays, which is actually quite sad.

Britt:  Pesto.

Helena Ochoa, Columnist: I would also agree that pesto is the best condiment. Consisting of basil, garlic, and olive oil, pesto is perfect partnered with lighter foods like bread, pasta, and salad. You can make it into dips, put it in sandwiches, and add it on pizza for splashes of flavor. It is high in Vitamin C, Vitamin A, calcium, and iron, and most of the calories come from unsaturated fats, which are important for sustaining a healthy heart. You usually come across it being served in fancier restaurants, which speaks a lot about its quality (though you can also easily make it yourself at home).

Elizabeth Stover, Columnist: The best condiment would, by far, is peanut butter. Peanut butter can be used across a large variety of food groups. It can serve as a side, pairing perfectly with different types of fruits, veggies, and salty foods, like chips and pretzels. Peanut butter can also add flavor to breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert. It can be added into pancakes, smoothies, or toast. It can be put on many types of sandwiches, and burgers. This delight is found in every dessert, including ice cream, mixed with chocolate, and can be put in many candies, cakes, or cupcakes. Peanut butter is overall the most versatile condiment and benefits almost any meal.

Riley Hurlburt, Columnist: I believe that ranch is the best condiment. Ranch can be used for many things, such as salads, chicken nuggets, pizza, and many more. Ranch just adds that flavor that makes the food better.

Camryn Marshall, Columnist: Ranch is by far the most superior condiment. Ranch is extremely versatile and can be used for salad, potatoes, french fries, pizza, chicken nuggets, and has even become its own unique flavor of Doritos. This condiment is the go-to for any meal because of it’s overpowering flavor and unique taste that cannot be replaced. It’s sweetness mixed with its iconic bitter tartness can be put on just about anything and everything.

Max Larsen, Columnist: Syrup.

Lillie Krasselt, Managing Editor: Peanut butter, period. It is undeniably the most versatile as it is the only condiment that can be used without judgement from savory foods to sweet foods and throughout every food culture. It is one of the best protein supplement for those with dietary restrictions and fits into all diets. It also has numerous health benefits and is high in healthy fats and antioxidants. It adds flavor without the unnecessary health drawbacks of all the other condiments. There are so many different flavor profiles and different usages of peanut butter that you can not deny it as the best condiment.

Which sauce reigns as the boss?

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